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The Politbureau planning the August 21st invasion of Soviet Union Square in New York.
The August 21st Revolution was somewhat delayed by the imperialist rain of terror thrown over Soviet Union Square at 1:35pm EST by the desperate Bush administration. Of course the Great Lenin used his colossal mind power to stop the rain from falling. The great leader later demonstrated to the masses how they could lift themselves by their bootstraps from the gigantic capitalistic puddle of terror.
~
The entry of our communist horde was expected. The masses cheered and greeted us using sound amplification devices
I am the Great Lenin and I'm reporting for duty!
Lenin emanates rays of brotherhood, equality and class struggle. The rays penetrate New Yorkers, causing them to abandon their worldly belongings and join the great collective consciousness
At the same time, the Great Che sends out the waves of love and intimacy to all the Pink'O Ladies on Union Square
Suddenly, in a desperate attempt to stop history, the Bush administration sends imperialist rain of terror on Soviet Union Square, causing a great puddle of terror
"Rain, rain, go away!" When the chants don't work, the Great Lenin steps forward
The Great Lenin uses his colossal mind power to stop the rain from falling
When the rain stops, Lenin pulls himself from the puddle by his bootstraps, encouraging everybody to do the same. "You can do it!" he was heard saying. "It's the same method we use to run socialist economies!"
After a short but effective class struggle Lenin raises fallen comrades from the dead
Let the re-education begin! Repeat after me: "Kerry good, Bush bad!"
Radio talk show host Sean Hannity - capitalist running mad dog!
Radio talk show host Laura Ingraham - reactionary chain dog of the bourgeoisie!
The imperialist rain dampened but couldn't destroy the educational tool of the masses - The People's Cube.
This Ultimate Egalitarian Puzzle teaches the people the correct attitude towards choice, competition, and collectivism, as well as improves self-esteem and provides hours of entertainment to the proletarians.
The advantages of The People's Cube are obvious:
NOBODY IS TOO FAST NOBODY IS TOO SLOW NOBODY IS TOO SMART NOBODY IS TOO STUPID EVERYBODY IS EQUALLY AVERAGE
Kommander Djin cures his dampened self-esteem by quickly solving The People's Cube and improving on his own record over and over.
The posters in front of him say:
Ann Coulter - reactionary neo-imperialist criminal!
Rush Limbaugh and Jonah Goldberg - reactionary chain dogs of the bourgeoisie!
Lenin cuts in line for free medical care
It's never too early for re-education!
Some of our comrades blink in the face of vehement opposition from revisionists and Trotskiite deviationists
Trotskiite: "I will crush you like so!"
More revisionists and Trotskiites
We learn the hard way not to take pictures of scary Bush-bashing Trotskiites
Anarchists cower and yield under the piercing stare of the Great Lenin
A hundred feet away, a large group of refugees from China is protesting against torture and repressions committed by the Chinese Communist government
Right next to the Chinese group the New York communists (not affiliated with Communists For Kerry) pay no attention to the witnesses of communist torture. Maybe those people deserve to be tortured! Instead, we hear stories about how sweet life is under the communist rule. Ivan Lenin's stories of his own experience in the Soviet Union are being dismissed as propaganda
Lenin versus Goliath
Member of a real communist cell with his own hand-written plackard: It's all Brooklyn's fault!
Komsomolets Rob effectively re-educates the masses
The Great Lenin performs entertainment services to the people
Lenin's mean guitar gets amplified through the Revolutionary Megaphone of Truth
Lisa Kudrow comes out of the closet to join Communists For Kerry. More and more Hollywood celebrities do!
Attention Hollywood celebrities who want their picture taken with Communists For Kerry: We are planning to show for the anti-Bush rally in New York on August 29th!
We just know you'll be there too!
Michael Moore and his brother take a break from food shopping to pay respect to Communists For Kerry
Michael Moore's brother also takes the bullhorn to complain that because of the Bush administration policies he has nothing to eat, as the Chinese refugees gape in bewilderment
The unaffiliated New York peasants
The undecided voter:
"Kerry or Bush? Bush or Kerry? I wish you communists took over and relieved us of the burden of making choices!"
The eye
Repeat after me: "Kerry good, Bush bad!"
Kerry good, Bush bad! Kerry good, Bush bad! Kerry good, Bush bad! Kerry good, Bush bad! Kerry good, Bush bad! Kerry good, Bush bad!
Excellent, comrades! You will receive your re-education certificates in the mail. Just fill out the three copies of the Party Questionnaire, ten pages each!
All pictures have been taken and self-censored by Red Eye, the official Party Photographer.
By
Scott Roberts 08/23/04 - 8:26 pm
When are you having another revolution. I was so pissed about missing this one. You guys are hilarious.
By
Harpo 08/24/04 - 12:37 am
I cannot believe how great lenin and Che look, it is a glory to the revolution.
By
bender 08/24/04 - 8:51 am
Wonderful Thanks for doing this.
By
gagarin 08/24/04 - 11:40 am
lenin rules!
By
cptham 08/24/04 - 12:40 pm
Brilliant! When are you coming to Peoples Republic of Rhodeilandstan?
By
Red Emma 08/24/04 - 1:50 pm
I fought in the failed revolution of the Sixties when I was a socialist for twenty minutes and I'm glad to see that at the outset of the "People's Century", the glorious light of the Revolution has not dimmed!!
By
Socialist 08/24/04 - 11:20 pm
In my country, we have problem. And that problem is the Jew. He take everybody money. And he never give it back.
Throw the Jew down the well! So our country can be free! You must grab him by his horns! Then we all have big party!
By
Druzhkov 08/25/04 - 6:15 am
Comrades! I commend you in your long and brave struggle against a sea of spies, wreckers, Trotskyites, as well as Right deviationists!
By
Billy Hank 08/25/04 - 12:10 pm
Loved the Red Cube. Unfortunately, it was not available at your store. Also, I would love to buy a T-shirt tagging Kerry as the "Cambodian" candidate.
By
OldSoldier 08/25/04 - 2:23 pm
As an old Cold War Soldier I kick your boot in friendship because of the efforts you make on behalf of the masses. I cannot recall having ever been so engaged by anyone who has had anything to say in this election year. You guys are off the chain, thank you for your great sense of humor and your efforts to share it. I wish I could be there to watch "the masses" react to your presence in NYC. I can't quit laughing.
By
awawa212 08/25/04 - 9:58 pm
Comrades,
The supriority of your classless vision and support of Dear Senator and Comrade Kerry stokes the fires of the proto-bourgeouis cockles of my Communist heart pumping the steel/Stalin-enriched Red blood of revolutionary zeal. Zeal, I affirm!
It is a particularly inspiring example of workers' solidarity to see Comrade Lenin taking his rightful place at the front of the line, rather than waiting at the end, in order to inspire workers' to greater efforts in waiting for just one of the bloodless and capitalist-parasite-free fruits of the cornucopia of Marxism.
By
Tito Titsarekinky 08/26/04 - 4:24 am
Ezy E and comrades. I thank you for brain wash. You are my leader!
By
Dan the Red 08/26/04 - 10:40 am
Comrades! You must continue your struggle against the evil corporations and their pawn G.W. Bush! We cannot have free markets where just anyone could succeed! Think of the horrible consequences to the government if the dirty masses didn't need it!
Long live the revolution! Long live the great Senator Kerry!
By
lyssa77 08/26/04 - 3:49 pm
I want to be in Che's private gulag! What a RED-hottie!!
By
Laffy 08/26/04 - 7:32 pm
Yes I miss meeting fellow commrads in toilet paper lines. Power to the worker!
By
eugenedelgaudio@erols.com 08/26/04 - 8:49 pm
You guys are better than Ho Chi Minh, Mao, Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton and the entire Chicago 7 combined. Take it from someone who started the Ted Kennedy Swim Team and the Barney Frank House Sitting Squad, you guys are over the top 100 per cent and out of the trenches.
By
B. Dover 08/26/04 - 10:42 pm
I believe that the guy with Michael Moore is not his brother, but rather Harvey Weinstein.
By
Guest 08/27/04 - 11:56 pm
both kerry and communism suck.
By
aingl 08/28/04 - 9:24 pm
Who is the baaaadddd asssssss wannabe with his shirt off. An obvious latin american peon!! Let us know the next meeting comrade Al will report.
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